When your husband tells you that the electricians are coming at 9am but doesn’t tell you that they will probably be here for about eight hours and that we won’t be able to access anything in the kitchen or through the back door – i.e. the garden or my office – and if they come at 8am we should let them in early even if we’re not prepared.
This is less of a moan or a dig and more of an insight into what I know many couples deal with. Different ways of doing things.
My way is to be uber prepared, asking/second guessing all necessary questions/requirements upfront until I have all the facts and then I can act accordingly with as much advance warning as possible and definitley an idea of how long it is going to take. In this case I would have cleared everything out of the kitchen and also moved the furniture that we currently have blocking the other back door so I could access stuff. I also would not have done two loads of washing early having changed all the beds, as I couldn’t get to any of the washing lines to put them out. Plus – and this being the biggest one – I would have lined up six hundred pre-made snacks for the kids to try and keep them calm throughout. I know how they function like they are my own eyes, ears and mouth.
Tom’s way is to go with the flow and act intuitively, which also works, just possibly not when me and the kids are around. We’re learning to benefit from the best of these sides of each other (we’re only had 12 years practice) but today I was just too tired.
I managed not to pick a fight though as he has been working his arse off as have I. Instead, I went to the Co-op and bought as many treats for us all as possible and then sat in my car outside the house and ate my share while staring at the palm tree opposite, listening to the radio and texting a friend.
What I really needed to do was some work, apply for some freelance work, tidy my studio, tidy the house after weeks of building work and still…still… sow those seeds. I wanted to exhale after all the homeschooling. I wanted to go for a run but I couldn’t find any of my kit. I really needed to actually just have a cup of tea.
Anyway, first world problems and the car sitting just had to do and the kids had their Xbox and finally we got the oven reconnected, which meant endless cups of tea to come just as we were at crumpling point. How easily we take all these things for granted.
In the garden, the prunus tree is still blossoming beautifully and not yet creating confetti all over the lawn (begging the wind not to blow, just for a bit) and the magnolia tree is starting to bloom (but also hoping those gorgeous flowers keep their furry jackets on for a bit longer so they don’t succumb to frost and go brown like last year).
Paradoxically, the crocuses look like they’ve just given up and gone back to bed, their royal purple and gold petals clasped tightly shut waiting to be sunkissed back to life again. Ive found some daffodils similarly nodding under the grasses and must move the snowdrops into the front while they are in the green.
The garden is definitely springing to life though, with promising growth on the angelica, lavender, agapanthus and chives and the first signs of the rhubarb crowns pushing up again. I did move these from the front garden to the raised beds at the end of summer last year so I hope they flourish as well in their new spot.
Time – I guess for all of it – will tell.